>>Got into nursing school. Sigh of relief. Worries and feelings of inadequacy - feelings hanging on the future, lingering in the pause anticipation - temporarily abated. Hopes and dreams racing like a heart shaken out of complacency, like a cooped up soul awakening at the first hint of spring's promised treasures. Trying to keep my head in the present.
>>Working as a certified nursing assistant at an alzheimers care center. Love my work. Well, mostly. Feel like a new kid trying to prove my merit, trying not to mess up. Finally getting the hang of things: routines, processes, preferences. Funny things happen every shift. Wielding clean underpants against combative old women, dodging punches and pinches, hearing unrealistic claims of reality... so funny. Have to watch out for the grandma pinch to the underside of the bicep. Oucha. Got pinched in the thigh the other day. Beware the mumbled jumble of words from the mouths of old men - they may be planning to make a move. The fantastic excuses of another for why they can't take a shower tonight... just had heart surgery (not true), already took two showers today (not true), etc...
>>Found new favorite activity: coloring in my human anatomy coloring book. Relieves stress AND is educational. Just starting the fun, so stay tuned.
>>Also, found true love.
>>Trying to not be such a grumpus, since it would be easy to make people's lives miserable without effort. Trying not to indulge in selfish glumness or critical spirit. Hard to shake off years of personality development. Can one fight against unpleasant disposition by embracing thankfulness, prying open a cemented heart? or is the fight an already lost battle, doomed by genetics, health, and deeply-ingrained ways of being? Sigh.
//LB//
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